Summer Wrap-up (Spider-Man and Batman)

A dramatic re-enactment of this post

It's been two and a half months since my last update. Lots of stuff has happened in my life during the summer (a trip to Malta and being approved for college, for example), but I've only seen two movies in the cinema. I didn't write reviews because the first one I saw was so bad I couldn't make myself review it, and then I felt like I couldn't review the second until I'd reviewed the first.

To catch up and get started with the autumn season, here's my thoughts on them:

The Amazing Spider-Man:

A wretched pile of shit, and the worst kind of superhero movie. The Amazing Spider-Man is a tale of Peter Parker as you've never seen him before: a bland non-character with no defining traits, whose role in the story and overall personality are whatever the writer feels like making them at any given moment. His stalker-crush Gwen Stacy falls in love with him for no adequate reason, other than because [insert your own Twilight comparison here].

The Lizard looks like crap and has motives almost as vaguely explored as Peter's. The story is bloated with way too many subplots, some of which never get any kind of resolution since this is assured to get a sequel due to the presence of Spider-Man in the title. Awkward pacing and dialogue, lame performances and so-so action scenes finish the unholy combination of elements which make up a movie that manages to only be the second-worst film I've seen this year because I happened to see This Means War.

Also, Peter Parker skateboards. Seriously, fuck this movie. Seeing Spider-Man raped like this, I can finally understand people who get really personally upset about Michael Bay's Transformers.

The Dark Knight Rises:

A worthy, if a bit shoddy, end to the trilogy, with surprisingly large ties to the Batman comics which the previous two movies seemed to be afraid of associating themselves with. The villains work damn well, the directing and dialogue are awesome, and the music is fantastic. The film drags a lot, though: it feels like it's two scripts mashed into one.

There are some minor plot holes that I only realised afterwards, and Batman still sounds really funny. The final twist about Bane is really unnecessary, and seems to only exist to please comic nerds. It was a really poor choice to undermine the climax of the film with that move. I really liked the ending, even if it was a bit cheesy and predictable.

Batman Begins ends up being my favourite of this series, because I really liked the Gotham in it, and it felt the most like a Batman movie.

The Avengers was my favourite superhero film of the summer, but it's such a different movie than The Dark Knight Rises that I don't think you can really compare them on any objective level. Apples and oranges.

The Avengers

The huge crossover film which the Marvel movie continuity has been building up to, The Avengers is a Joss Whedon blockbuster about Captain America (Chris Evans), Iron Man (Robert Downey Jr.), Thor (Chris Hemsworth), The Hulk (Mark Ruffalo), Black Widow (Scarlett Johannson) and Hawkeye (Jeremy Renner) teaming up to fight Thor's evil brother Loki (Tom Hiddleston), who is poised to take over Earth. However, "teaming up" is easier said that done, and Director Nick Fury (Samuel L. Jackson) has to do a lot of managing to keep the team from tearing itself apart before Loki and his allies from another dimension can.

Finally, we get a movie that depicts superhero comics accurately: you need to know the central characters and premises of about half a dozen different stories to understand anything that's going on. Yay!

I was kind of wary about this film because of two things: The trailers mostly focused on a huge metropolitan battle that was cut so that it looked like it was taken right out of Transformers 3, as well as Robert Downey Jr. doing his thing, which I feel is starting to get old. Well, screw marketing, because once again it has done a great job at making a good movie look bad. Not only is that action scene they hyped way better when you don't have to butcher it to keep the invading army from appearing on screen, but they picked the worst jokes in the movie for their adverts. Not only does Downey get a lot of good lines, but everyone does. There's a surprising lot of comedy, and every character gets to crack jokes, not just the clown.

Thor and Captain America both had pacing as their biggest issue. Cap had way too little stuff happen in between his becoming a superhero and the final battle. Thor took its sweet time starting, and then had way too much build-up to a way too small climax. Avengers gets this just right. We already know these characters, there's no need to establish them any more. Let's just start off with the crisis presenting itself, then get the characters together, and then see what we can make happen with them. I'll admit I was getting worried about a quarter way in that the movie is going to suffer from having too many subplots, but thankfully most of them are resolved by the way the final action climax hits home. The movie is two hours and a third, but it accomplishes so much that you'll swear there's no way they fit all that in one hundred and forty minutes.

The performances are really good. I never saw Ed Norton's Hulk for comparison, but Mark Ruffalo is a fantastic Bruce Banner. He has the body language of a person who's trying really hard to keep themselves in check. All the returning cast keep up the high quality up, but to my surprise the standout star of the film was Tom Hiddleston. I was kind of indifferent toward Loki in Thor, because he was way too obviously evil but they tried to play him as this tragic character. Here, he's past being sympathetic, so Hiddleston gets to be a straight-up villain, and it works greatly. He does his slimy villain speeches, he addresses the people he wants to rule, he gets arrogant and he gets furious. It's just a really good basic evil villain, who is still kept fresh with expert writing.

The action is really well-done. All the characters get to shine, and their individual superpowers are used well together and never conveniently discarded to fit a scene better. The big battle scenes flow well, and you can keep track of where everyone is and what they're doing. There's this really great sweeping battle shot that I can't really describe to you all: it has to be seen to be believed. I think that Loki's evil army allies are maybe a little bit too... Stormtroopery, though at least unlike Stormtroopers, they don't get taken down by teddy bears (who would be the New York police department in this allegory, I guess).

The 3D was... okay, I guess. There was one scene early on where I had trouble telling what was happening because it was so dark, but other than that I was never bothered. There were a couple of cool 3D shots, mostly having to do with Hawkeye's crazy arrow skills, but I doubt you'll be missing much if you see it in regular 2D.

Overall, it's just a damn good film, with a tightly packed and well-crafted plot, lots of interesting and memorable characters, some good humour, great action and superhero goodness. Dark Knight Rising has to work its ass off to surpass this for the best superhero film of the summer.

The Adventures of Tintin

Hey! Finland got a cameo in this picture.

AT LAST! Us Europeans get a movie almost two months before the North Americans do! I feel so vindicated for having to wait half a year for Princess and the Frog to come out. I guess it figures. After all, The Adventures of Tintin is based on an European comic. In fact, this film redeems Franco-Belgian comics in Hollywood from the wake of the lame live-action Asterix films. Let us never bring those things up again.

Tintin is a reporter of ambiguous nationality who has a tendency to get into an adventure pretty much any time he opens his front door. While browsing a flea market, he buys the miniature of an old wooden ship. This causes him and his helpful dog Milou (I refuse to use translated names for these characters, by the way) to be dragged into danger's way. He eventually teams up with Captain Archibald Haddock in a race to find all the clues to a fabulous treasure before the bad guys do.

I was at first pretty sceptical about this movie. Not because it's CG (though a cartoon movie could have worked better), but because I thought they might try to alter the premise to sell it better to audiences who are used to "comic book movies" like The Dark Knight. However, I should have put my trust on Steven Spielberg; Tintin is perfectly in tune with its adventurous roots, and captures the feeling of a children's comic book almost spot-on. And as for those who are sceptical of the CGI, I think that the film looks pretty good. The characters' skins are a bit too unsmooth and blemished for my liking, but it wasn't really distacting. As far as stylished CGI goes, I prefer Tangled, but this is a not-so-close second.

There are so many big names attached to this picture, and most of their individual little touches can be felt throughout. Tintin is a Spielberg producation throughout, complete with music by John Williams. I might be bold enough to call it Indiana Jones 5. Peter Jackson is the producer, will direct the sequel if one is made, and brought along Andy Serkis (Gollum from The Lord of the Rings trilogy) to play Haddock. Edgar Wright (Shaun of the Dead, Hot Fuzz) co-wrote the script, and his BFFs Simon Pegg and Nick Frost voice bumbling detectives Dupont and Dupond. I can't help but get this funny image of Spielberg inviting people to the pre-production table and yelling: "And bring your friends too!"

The action scenes in Tintin are great, with really imaginative scenarios and a damn good balance of serious and silly to them. They get a little cluttered at times, but never descend to incomprehensibility. I think that near the end, the action focuses too much on Haddock and too little on Tintin, but it's all well and good because Haddock is damn entertaining. He's like that character we've all seen a million times, the one who always screws everything up, but he still manages to be endearing and funny when he messes around. However, one thing that I really didn't expect to amuse me so much as the slapstick. I don't think I've ever seen such well-executed physical humour in a motion picture. This isn't your Disney movie where for every punchline the comedy foil says he also has to get hit in the head once, so that audience members with no sense of humour can also find something to laugh at. Here, the slapstick is an end to itself, and the hurt is set up and handled with excellence.

I'm not going to criticise Tintin for having an overly convoluted plot and contrived action scenes. It's an adventure story: people in these things can't file taxes without having to solve five riddles. fight off eight henchmen and escape three death traps. What I am going to criticise it for is having a weak pacing. This is probably a result of the comic adaptation, but that's not an excuse. There's too little rest between action scenes, and at times the plot is unveiled too quick for my taste. At one hour and fifty minutes, this is already a pretty long animated movie, but I think the script needed some work to make it more balanced and less exhausting.

That's... pretty much it. It's a solid adventure film with good humour, and lots of talented people behind the scenes. I didn't really read Tintin as a kid, but I read Uncle Scrooge comics, and the feeling of adventure in this movie makes me tingle with nostalgia.